Cowboy Hat Rules and an Interview with KB

Hi Honey!
Howdy

Are you happy to be interviewed by me?
*laughing*
Yes

Are you ready for something other than yes/no questions?
No

Where do you see us in 25 years?
In 25 years, I see us puttin on our jet packs and taking our dog... No wait, that's an episode of the Jetson's. Sorry. I see us livin on our ranch, pickin on our grand babies and me painting our pipe fence blue.

The actual topic of this post is rules. Specifically, Cowboy Hat Rules. Where did you learn the rules?
Different sources: older cowboys and my grandpa.

Did your grandpa in Iowa wear a cowboy hat?
Sometimes, but he talked about hats in general. "You just don't mess with a man's hat"

Remember on 6-06-06? Why did you get so angry when you came in the door?
You know the answer to that question.

So, what are the rules of cowboy hat treatment and wearing?
First of all, don't mess with another man's hat.
If you have to move it, lay it down the same way they had it laying down. There are different beliefs about how to lay down a hat. Remember that most cowboy's don't have a lot of things, so what they do have is probably special to them.
If you are willing to mess with a cowboy's hat, there are a couple of things you should take into account: What kind of person is that cowboy? Some of them will just haul off and slug you and at the very minimum will get mighty pissed off. As a girl, you better think about what kind of person is that cowboy's cowgirl is; the same just might be true of her. Also, as a girl, there is the chance that you'll get kissed by the cowboy. I'm not sure where that tradition came about, but it seems to work.
Just think of it this way - how would you feel if you had a favorite tool, art piece, I don't know, something precious to you, say, a gift from your child, and people were messing with it just out of stupidity? You don't juggle Grandma's fine china. And no, you aren't going to break the hat. But, every dent and ding tells a story and it should be your own story. Sweat in the brow. Dirt on the brim. You get my point, don't you?
And PS. Wife? You usually know what I am trying to say say I don't have the words, so feel free to fix any of this as you see fit.

I didn't.

So, if I go and put on your hat right now, will I get a kiss?
*laughing*
You don't need to wear my hat to get kissed, Wife. But, since you got your hair cut and colored yesterday (I haven't told y'all about this, have I?), I'd advise again wearing my hat. Want that kiss now?

Later people! End of interview.

Man you better let go
You can't hold on to
What belongs to me
And don't belong to you

I caught you looking
With your roving eye
So Mister you don't have to act
So surprised

If it's her you want
I don't care about that
You can have my girl
But don't touch my hat

I grew up lonesome
On the open range
And that cold North wind
Can make a man feel strange

My John B. Stetson
Was my only friend
And we've stuck together
Through many a woman

So if it's her you want
I don't care about that
You can have my girl
But don't touch my hat

My mama told me
Son to be polite
Take your hat off
When you walk inside

But the winds of change
They fill the air
And you can't set your hat down
Just anywhere

So if you plead not guilty
I'll be the judge
We don't need no jury
To decide because

I wear a seven
And you're out of order
'Cause I can tell from here
You're a seven and a quarter

But if it's her you want
I don't care about that
You can have my girl
But don't touch my hat

If it's her you want
I don't care about that
You can have my girl
But don't touch my hat

No it never complains
And it never cries
And it looks so good
And it fits just right

But if it's her you want
I don't care about that
You can have my girl
But don't touch my hat

You can have my girl
But don't touch my hat
You can have my girl
But don't touch my hat

--Lyle Lovett